I have always gone to church as far back as I can remember. The third child of a God loving mom, our mom somehow got us all dressed and in the car and at church most every Sunday. The continuing effects of this are immeasurable. We were members, like my maternal grandmother, of the Church of Christ, so my religion started off with a bang. Every Sunday the message was the same. We were all sinners, and we were all going to hell. I got it. I was baptized on a Saturday night when the thought of dying as a sinner was too much to bear any longer. Of course I believed. It was all I knew. I saw God as angered, disappointed in me. It wasn’t until I was a young adult that I became aware of the deep love of God. Love was mixed with sin. I experienced the joy of feeling His love. And I could see it everywhere. His open arms. It was then that I really began to read the Bible. Daily. I went deeper.
In Luke 5:4 the disciples are fishing but without good results. Jesus spoke to them saying “put out into deep water”. I don’t think he was only referring to fish. In the Streams in the Desert book, the author explains “the depth of the water into which we sail depends upon how completely we have cut our ties to the shore, the greatness of our need, and our anxieties about the future. Yet the fish were to be found in the deep, not the shallow, water. Our needs are to be met in the deep things of God.”
A quote from J. Gresham Machen, in the same book is as follows:
How far have we advanced into this river of life? The Holy Spirit desires that our “self” be completely submerged—not merely ankle deep, knee deep, waist deep, but self deep”. And he tells us “let loose the lines holding you to the shore and sail into the deep. And never forget, the Man who does the measuring is with us today.”
The more I read the Bible, His plan becomes more clear. I began to see that His suffering was for me, the sinner. His precious blood was shed for MY sin. I didn’t have to carry my sin around anymore! My sins are forgiven. I felt at ease with His word. The more I read, the more I felt God’s presence and the Holy Spirit. And also, recently I began to grasp the pervasiveness of my sin. I’ve circled back to the early 70’s when I was told that I was a sinner and going to hell. Except now I see my sin, I ask for forgiveness and I experience God’s expansive love and forgiveness everyday. Jesus is even more precious to me. His love is beyond comprehension. His care, His Glory, His Grace. Come Lord, stay with me. Continue to lead me into your deep water. What a glorious insightful journey this has been. Let it continue. Not in a circle but in a straight line to heaven.
Are you going in circles? Are you in the shallow water? Go deep.
In the Valley of Vision, Puritan Prayers and Devotions book two excerpts:
“The Dark Guest”
The memory of my great sins, my many temptations, my falls, bring afresh into my mind the remembrance of thy great help, of thy support from heaven, of the great grace that saved such a wretch as I am. There is no treasure so wonderful as that continuance experience of thy grace toward me which alone can subdue the rising of sin within: Give me more of it.
“The Deeps
Quarry me deep, dear Lord, and then fill me to overflowing with living water.
Godspeed,
God Speaks 